cart wheels + frustration = ow!

lovin the rockin pic huh? lol im so sillY!

Yesterday I came to stacys house at like midnight and played seen it. Stacy won. Then I thought it would be a good idea to die my hair. Turns out... it wasnt.

Today was pretty boring. I woke up and came to stacy's and practiced cart wheels with Riley, which she can do really well, and I SUCK at them! They are so hard to do! Anyways, I have to learn to do them for cheerleading!! It sucks. Anyways, I went home and played Balderdash with my mom John and David. That game is really fun! I got 2nd. Then I came back to Stacys and Played seen it! And of course stacy won...again. And since I always lose, she thinks its funny to call Bissel... like the vaccum (because i suck lol). I know shes mean right? lol =) jk

Girls Night Out...Hopefully

Today was kinda boring. I woke up and went to the dollar store and got stuff to make no bake cookies and brownies. I helped make them then david came over and we played monopoly and watched tv. Kinda a boring day.

I feel bad for Stacy. I know she needs a break, and like I said before- I WANT to help. So I am going to. Im setting up a girls night out for her, so Liz Roxanna and Stacy can go out with her, And me and David will stay and Watch all of the kids. If it doesn't work out I think i'll see if maybe one of her friends want to do something... or maybe she'd like to go by herself... I bet she's feelin what I do...She needs time to herself... or atleast a second. lol I hope this helps, and works out.

A bad day

Yesterday at cheerleading practice I hurt my knee pretty bad. I was "trying" to do a cartwheel and when I landed I popped my knee like four times. It hurt really bad when I did it. Then aftr a while it sorta went away. But then I went home and walked around a little bit and it started hurting really bad. Then it started getting worse, so I went to Stacy's house to get a wrap thingy so Stacy could wrap it then I went back home and took some medicine...then I fell on it! omg It hurt SO bad!! But then DAN brought me Mc. Donalds =) =) =) lol Today it feels better, but I had to walk on it alot because I went to David's mom house. It was fun, but really awkward. We watched the movie The Eye, it was ok. And ate tacos, and stuff like that. I had fun. But my knee feels weird, and hurts- just not as bad. I've always sorta had problems with this knee, like it will lock up and ill almost fall and stuff like that... I dunno...

The world accordingly...

Today I mainly did nothing. I fought with David, Played monopoly and came to Stacy's. Im here now, babysitting. Which i love. I love them kids too DEATH! And I like helping Stacy. I'd go crazy if I was Stacy and Dan! 4 kids...I dont know how they do it, so i like to help sometimes. Or atleast try lol. I love it when they let me babysit Layla (which doesn't happen very often) Because it makes me feel like they really trust me. I understand though, she really hates bein away from her mommy. Im so happy she's up and walkin around. Our theory is that its our fault because the floor was dirty alot and she didnt have anywhere to walk! lol jk Yeah, she so cute. Her and Greg are adorable, I think its so cool that they are the same age.

Doesn't everyone like Stacy's hair!? Cute huh!? lol I wish mine was as long as hers was! lol But it's gettin there.

Riley and Ryder are playin operation right now, I just got done playin checkers with Riley. I love playin with them lol. Board games are so fun! Im such a nerd!
I remember when Stacy Dan and my sisters would always play board games... that never happens anymore. I miss things like that.

I find myself always being sad when I think of the past. When I think of how I always used to go to Stacy's and play with Roxanna, Liz, and the boys. And now im lucky if I see Roxanna once in a week, Tim maybe once a month, and Michael never. But luckally I see Liz everyday because we live together,I dont know what ill do when she moves out and im all alone. But maybe alone will be good.

Anyways, getting off subject, I really never see Dan either. I sure do miss that kid. I get sad when I think about holidays and get excited thinking Im going out to grandmas and everyones going to be there! But then I remember, Grandma is in the nursing home... and everything is just so messed up. When my grandma had a stroke it seemed like my whole world game crashing down. I mean she seemed so strong...I never would of seen that coming. My Grandpa died in September and that was also very sad. But atleast he's not suffering anymore, and he's looking down on me. But Grandma... well it just seems like shes sitting there, just waiting for it. I hate that thought. If I was her I dont know what i would do. It just doesn't seem right. I want to fix it but I cant. I hate this feeling. It almost seems like failure eventhough I didnt do anything wrong. Except I should see her more. But it only makes me sad seeing her the way she is. But I love how her eyes light up when she sees me. But when I leave I want to cry. I hate it. I hate the way this all had to happen. I need my grandma...and grandma...and aunt...and uncles... I want everything to be different but i cant change it. I would if i could and I would make everything better.

Its hard for me to beleive in God sometimes. I mean why would he do this? Why would he make people sad? There are so many unanswered questions about god.... Who made god? Where was he before he made all of this? Stuff like that...But I know I should just beleive...but its hard sometimes...i guess thats where faith comes in.

I feel like I dont even know my mom anymore. I never talk to her unless it's asking her a question. It would be nice for her to come sit by me on the couch and watch tv with me or talk to me acutally. But I guess she is busy.

My grandma is the same way, but i just annoy her. I pretty much annoy everyone. Its the normal i suppose. But i can't change who i am, and if i could...well, I wouldn't.

I love going to Stacy's. Its because I like being surrounded by family. The part of my family that acutally wants me their... and when im there the kids actually want me to do stuff with them and play with them... not like everywhere else where everyone wants me to shut up and leave them alone.

So i talked to liz about how I am never alone and I need alone time and about how I don't see how she's not like me (my attitude). Unfortunitly its because she cries...she cries instead. I feel so bad for her... But she atleast gets to leave...but the bad thing...is that she's leaving me... all alone...when im at my house it will be like im in my own little world.

Well Stacy, that means you'll probably be seein more of me, if thats possible...

Fun Times At Stacy's

So today I started cleanin out Stacy's van for a little bit of Mulaw...no what im sayin? lol Well now Im babysittin Riley and Ryder. They are being really good. I haven't had to get on to them or anything. They are playin checkers, Im about to go join them. They've pretty much just been watching tv. Liz Stacy Lily and Layla and Greg, all went to go get Stacy's hair cut. Im sure it'll look cute. Shes gonna put pic on her blog. I told them id watch all of the kids. I think I could handle it.Have a little faith in me people. lol Well anyways I will mow your yard for 15-20$
babysit for 5$ every 2 hours, and do your laundry for 5$, and wash your car for 5$. Call me up if I no u and u isnt some freak! Like I mean stacy or roxanna or anyone should call... so its like i mean if u got my number then call, if u dont i aint givvin it to u, cuz ur probably a freak no wat i mean?

Good Day

Mapona Lake ( as Lily calls it )

Today me and David and liz Roxanna Ryan and Greg and Stacy and fam... went to the "Mapona" Lake. It was really fun, i tried to teach Riley how to float on her back but that didn't work out all that well lol! I wanna go again soon!

I gotta bad attitude

Not gonna lie, But if you were me, you'd have one too. I'm not feeling sorry for myself or anything- But let's Re-Cap here. Ok, So I live in the smallest town ever, In a 2 bedroom house with my Grandma, Mom, sister, and me, and two dogs. My mom's very obnoxious boyfriend just moved out- but they are still dating so he is still over here sometimes. I sleep on the couch...because my bedroom is the living room. I never have any privacy- or alone time. I'm about to explode... I can't handle this anymore. I lost my ring that boyfriend got me for my birthday the other day, so he is mad at me, and Im grounded from him for having a bad attitude- and for saying something jokingly to my grandma. I really need time to myself or I am litterally going to go freaking insane!! If I had my own room id be alot better off because I could sit in there by myself and get away from people for just alittle bit. Even if me and liz shared a room it would be better. I don't know how liz is overcoming all of this and still has her uppity happy nice personallity. When Im here biten off everyone's heads that even attempt to talk to me... sorry about that by the way. Im NOT saying that everyone around me annoys me... Im just sayin I need Me time, time so just sit there without anyone asking me to do something, talkin to me, or anything. Just me sitting there...

4 for you Glen Coco, You GO Glen Coco!

I haven't had anything to Blog about or else I would have updated sooner.

Well, I really have nothing to write about today, But Stacy said I need to write a new post so I am.

4 for you Glen Coco, You GO Glen Coco!

Has been stuck in my head for the past like week!! I don't know why.

Well Saturday I have to march in the parade, and do a cheer, and CHS with poms... So that means I have practice tomorrow................yay, NOT! lol

I'll let you know when something exciting happens... It'll probably be a while though.

Oh, and maybe if people would comment on my blogs- i'd write more =) lol